Dear John...

Ever since I met you, I never meant to feel this way about you, it only took me a day to like you, and it took me a month to love you.
Life without you has no meaning, my entire soul is empty without you by my side, Being beside you has always been the very core and foundation of my strength. I know I have committed one mistake after the other and I bet you grew tired of it, you turned a deaf ear towards my apologies, I understand, I was too insensitive thinking that you never even bothered to care. I strongly apologize for what happened, I am lost without you that I have to act out or I will explode, being there with you but wasn't able to hold you was too much for me to bear.
For all these years that we have been together, making you smile was the greatest gift I could possibly imagine. Being with you was euphoric that I wish time would seize to exist, touching you was ecstatic that I wish that we could be like that forever. Our days and moments together was blissful.
I would do anything in my power just to go back in time and do this all over again, and this time no mistakes and i would never hurt your fragile and sensitive heart, I would do anything to keep that smile on your face, I would not exchange you for anything and anyone else. No amount of money in the world can ever replace you.

Honey.. We've been together for over a year and 5 months already.. we have successfully triumphed against all odds including 3rd parties on my part on which we saw how furious you can become. You were red in fury, you're hands and feet are shaking with anger your voice, stuttering in madness and your hands almost wanting to devour me alive.. I've seen you do that so many times especially when I'm running late on our meetings, when you think I'm not at home, when you know that I didn't ask permission to go out, when you have the gut feeling that I am with someone.. I enjoy making you mad, not because that is how much I hate you and that is because I'm fooling around with you.. No honey.. I enjoy making you mad, because after you get mad at me... before the end of the day.. you hug me so tight, kiss me tenderly and plead to me not to do it again... I run it over and over again into my mind.. why? I do such things to make you mad, to make you hate me.. indeed you will hate me, you forsake me.. but at the end of the day.. you forgive me.. ..

I remember the time.. when i spoke with you and asked you about Benneth Cabrera's Accusation that you are just after my money... You looked me in the eye and said " Ganun... naniniwala ka dun sa sinungaling na yun.. gusto mo bng bigyn kita ng 12k ngayon ding oras na ito tapos lumayas ka na sa harapan ko?" I immediately answered to you.. "that it was not the point.. I do not need that money... That money can't even buy me an entire outfit...a zara woman silk tank top costs Php 2800, a Zara Basic shorts costs another 2500, a wacoal swarovski push up bra costs 3900, a vintage silk twill scarf from hermes 13000, a messenger cap from Giordano is a thousand, a havaianas gold top is worth 1600.. do you think your 12k will suffice? I do not think so... the 12k cannot even buy a single piece of vintage scarf." Then you laughed and said "You amaze me with the way you talk your way out.. Kaya ako'y iyong iyo."

I cannot even remember how many times I confronted you with Benneth Cabrera's words.. but no matter how many times I insist you face me.. and explain every accusation I throw at you and insisted "Wala akong girlfriend ikaw lng..wala akong ibang gus2 kung hindi ikaw lng... matagal ko n syang hindi kinakausap simula nung gulong ginawa niya so please huwag kng maniwala sa mga pinagsasabi niya..kng kakausapin ko man siya dahil sa business I'll let you know before I talk to her."

It amazes me when you tell me.. "that no girl has ever dared to make a fool out of you except me.., wala png babaeng nakapagpagalit sa akin kapag nalalaman kong may iba syang kasama except ikaw. "

I wanted you to remember that these odds are making our bonds even stronger than ever.. It keeps the affection grow even stronger..

Our everyday conversation keeps me alive, your daily servings of "I love you, I miss you, when will you come home to me?" keeps me strong when were apart..

That is why no matter what happens, no matter how many cute guys, even the hotter ones are around there somewhere trust me when I tell you my heart solely belongs to you. I admit I have been with a lot of boys that entertain me.. but none of them can ever replace you... You Complete me.. The way you force me to do things that I do not want to do..keeps me at your side, because you never cease to amaze and interest me.

i love you.. and i trust you.. no matter what happens I will believe you... and I will always welcome you with open arms... just look back and you will always see me behind you watching your back...

For a year and a half we've struggled over people who were trying to break us a part, people who would do everything just to make us turn against each other, yet until now they haven't succeeded to tear us a part; from people who prevaricates your real statement just to make me hate you, from people who makes up a Facebook account and broadcasted that you're in a relationship with her and claims that you both made it just to make me abandon you, from people who would humiliate you in front of everybody and claims that I slept with him and that I wanted to be with him and I no longer wanted to be with you, from people who would rant me out to you and claims that they saw me with somebody else just for you to call me and make you hate me, from people who claims that you're cheating on me because you were with her one time whereas she barely has no idea that you let me know about it, from people who dibs that you said that you cannot bear to sleep with me considering that we have been sleeping together at home for such a long time already, from people who claims that you're merely after my money, from people who kept up with the pretense that you're the one who is lying and she's not.

You're incessant jealousy over a person who was once very dear to you is making me sad, I cannot bear the words you utter especially when you mention him, you keep insisting that were having an affair whilst we never did not even once, your immature reactions stating; "baka hindi ko siya matantsa kapag nakita ko sya, bakit hindi siya nagpapaalam sa akin kapag magpapasama siya sa iyo, lahat ng magpapasama sa iyo kailangan sa akin muna magpaalam bago sabihin sa iyo"

Yet your perpetual jealousy keeps me even more interested and that is exactly what's making me stay, the way you force me to do things I do not want, the way you affectionately manipulate me just to make me do what you want is utterly brilliant, although I realize what's happening the bad thing is, I'm letting you do it, the way you affectionately make me say yes when I insist that it is a NO, is amusing.

I love you.... and I will always do, just make sure you keep me interested all the time ok..